Mind Games and Day 2

In my opinion, or at least for me, changing my lifestyle from one of frequent overeating and minimal physical activity to one of making appropriate and healthy food choices and daily physical activity is mostly a mental challenge.  It's a mind game.  For me it comes down to willpower.  I can do it, but will I allow myself to do it?

I'm no poet.  But as I was thinking about mental challenge several weeks ago some thoughts started to form and I wrote them down.  Here are my thoughts in Poem form:

The Wanderer’s Prayer 
(From a white male’s perspective)

I. I Will. I Will What? Not, I Will Do What? But, I Will That.

Will.  The only thing we truly possess.  The only thing we can truly give.

The only true power is willpower.

There is no poor, smart, lucky; no unlucky, rich, stupid.  Only those Who Will and those Who Will Not. 

We’re all given the same currency in life.  Time.  24 hours.  What will you with yours? What Will You? Will You? You?

I'm not sure that that is particularly meaningful to others, but I think that it really shows were I struggle -- Willpower.  I know that I am capable of so much if I would just will it to be.  I need to take control and do it.  That's precisely why I've created this blog; It helps me to take control and to do.

Day 2 Update:

Today I started the Couch to 5k, or C25K.  I downloaded this app on my phone.  According to the program, today was week 1 day 1.  Today's workout consisted of a brisk 5 minute warm up walk, 8 sets of run(ahem, jog) for 60 seconds followed by 90 seconds of walking, and concluded with a 5 minute cool down walk.  In all it was a 30 minute workout.  The app keeps time of each segment and there's a chime and voiced instruction for when each transition is to be made.

It was both harder and easier than I thought it would be.  I started off with my warm up walk.  No problems there.  Then came my first 60 seconds of running.  I Thought I Was Going To Die.  Oh my gosh, I knew I was out of shape, but dang!  I started thinking to myself, "I don't think I can do this.  Maybe I'll only do half of the first day's workout."  But I kept pushing myself.  Each time I thought I could run no farther the chime sounded and the 90 seconds of walking was just what I needed.  By the time those 90 seconds were up I was ready to run again.  I completed 4 of the 8 sets and I was tired, but I knew that I was half way done.  I told myself that I was capable of finishing the workout.  It was hard, tiring, and it totally pushed me, but I completed it!  It felt really good to be able to do it.  Afterwards I thought, "That wasn't so bad..."  I allowed my mind to tell my body what I was able to do and I believed it.  I feel that my mental strength increased as much as, if not more than, my physical strength did through that workout.  

Eating well is a total mind game.  I am used to eating whatever I want whenever I want.  My body has also gotten used to it.  It's almost as if when I don't feel full I feel hungry.  It makes it harder to eat well and to eat appropriate amounts of food.

Last night the most difficult time of the day, the time that I wanted to eat extra food the most, was the time between my last meal (a small granola type bar) and the time I went to bed.  I had to consciously talk my body mind out of being hungry.  I knew I didn't need to eat I only wanted to eat.  I successfully went to bed without eating other food.  When I woke up I felt great.  I wasn't starving.  I wasn't even particularly hungry.  I won the mental battle.

Tonight I had a lovely meal of Chicken, freshly cooked green beans, quick pickle cucumbers (one of my favs), and fresh spinach. The spinach kind of tasted usually strange, but everything else was amazing.  I think the chicken was my favorite part.  I seasoned it with non-fat Italian dressing, garlic powder, onion powder, Italian seasoning, and red pepper flakes.  I'm hoping to prove to myself that eating healthy tasty food is possible.